“Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every relationship you have.”
-Robert Holden
Relationships are central to human connection. We find ourselves in various kind of relationships with people all around us. As social beings, it then becomes essential to build healthy relationships. Let us take a moment to understand what one values in a relationship. When we take some time to think about it, we allow ourselves to look within and examine our own needs. For instance, I personally value mutual respect, empathy, understanding, trust, and love. For these, it is essential to be self-aware and to communicate mindfully with others.
We often find ourselves in situations where we feel that if we had paused for a moment, we might have reacted differently. Relationships, in part, are based on the way we communicate with other people and the recognition of our own and the other person’s needs. Mindfulness helps us do this by purposefully bringing our attention to the present moment. Various practices, such as noticing our thoughts and emotions, becoming aware of bodily sensations and relating them to our feelings, and focusing on one’s breath, help us ground ourselves in the here and now.
Regular practice of mindfulness helps reduce emotional reactivity. This is because these practices help us make space between the stimulus and the response. Mindfulness enables us to pause and assess our feelings, and helps us to respond rather than react. All of us have certain things that may trigger some feelings for us. For example, coming home to a messy house or hearing someone speak to us in a particular tone may cause us to react negatively. When we have insight into our feelings and our triggers, we are able to step away and give ourselves time to process and deal with the situation in a more constructive manner. In the situations mentioned above, one may take some time for deep breathing, and then communicate with other people in a more favourable way. Self-awareness brought on by mindful practices also helps us regulate our tone and body language in stressful situations that may otherwise lead to conflict. This helps maintain a peaceful environment by enabling us to choose our response in a way that promotes growth.
In addition to communication, mindfulness also promotes active listening. Through non-judgemental observation of our own thoughts and feelings, we create an atmosphere of compassion within. This helps us be more present and empathetic when other people convey their emotions. Mindfulness also brings to the forefront everyday wonders that we may miss otherwise. Small habits and actions that convey love and care become more apparent and noticeable. This helps us cherish the beauty of human connection and realise what we are grateful for in our lives. This gratitude extends to our relationships with others, creating an environment in which we appreciate and value those around us.
“The roots of a lasting relationship are mindfulness, deep listening, and loving speech.”
-Thich Nhat Hanh
Dear Maam
Applying mindfulness in day to day life is really very useful.I am using mindful listening and mindful eating.It is very helpful.Thank you maam for sharing the beautiful article.
Its a pleasure to know that this article of mine has been beneficial to you especially in the choice of food you make.
Thank you so much ma’am. Sometimes we forget that we also need to be mindful about what people tell us and not brush it aside making ourselves uncomfortable. Very true we must be mindful of our own thoughts.
Absolutely Lakshmi! Being mindful of our surroundings and managing our thoughts accordingly can have a great impact.